Monday, May 15, 2017

Lost Pony, Found Pony: A Lesson Learned

To hear the whispers, the herd must first feel the hooves.  And, that is what happened to Lily, our pony.  She has been feeling a lot of hooves lately.

Here's the story:

I had put feelers out for rehoming, trying to find someone who would spend more time with her than I have and, almost instantly, a woman emerged who wanted her for a companion horse.  We communicated back and forth, and I made a deal with her: she could have Lily for free as long as she would give her back to me should she ever change her mind or her circumstances change.  She agreed, and set about getting her trailer fixed to pick her up.

On the day of the transfer, my trainer volunteered to take Lily to the woman because she was going that way to pick up another horse.  When she arrived at my place, I'd changed my mind, and Lily clearly did not want to go.  When she saw the trailer pull in, she tried to hide behind me.  So, I went back and forth, and back and forth, but finally, realizing the woman had already fixed her trailer and was on the way to the meeting place--I felt I had to follow through.  (Mistake.)

The transfer occurred, but about 5 days later, the woman called me to say that it wasn't working out. Her horses weren't accepting Lily and they were being really mean to her.  The woman felt very bad for Lily, and she honored her promise to give her back. (Thank you!!!!)

On Mother's Day, yesterday, we met half way and I got my girl back!  NEVER will I try to rehome her again.  I learned my lesson.  She was no worse for wear--if anything, even sweeter than before she left.

But unfortunately, my horses had moved on without her and felt they had to put her in her place--thus the opening statement of this blog.  To hear each other's whispers, they must first feel the hooves.  I have Lily separated from them now, and she's communicating through the panels.  I feel sick that we're starting all over again for NO GOOD REASON except my stupidity.  It was a good lesson to learn on Mother's Day.  I need to LISTEN to my inner voice and NEVER doubt it--especially when it comes to taking care of my loved ones.


Update on drinking water.  Apparently, you can drink too much.  If you drink until your urine is clear--every day--you can upset your electrolyte balance.  You can even kill yourself!  I had a bad headache one day after a drinking a bunch of water to catch up--and when I looked it up, I found that your urine should actually be a light yellow--the color of straw.  I backed off.  Now, I drink small amounts of water all day.


Leah and I continue to work with the side reins (on the ground) and then continue the same training in saddle.  It's working well.  I'm getting much smoother walk/trot transitions. Of course, all of this is to make her a better trail horse.  So, the trust and partnership is always the #1 goal--everything else is secondary.  We're taking her to a large water crossing this Saturday, so that foundation needs to be there.


The whole spring grass thing is SCARY!!!  I'm trying to find the balance between allowing them time with the herd, grazing time, and keeping their weight healthy.  Little Joe insists on going out with them.  Leah is a little better at staying in the stall and eating dry hay.

So far, Little Joe is staying on the skinny side. (Even with Super Weight Gain & Equine Senior, that has beet pulp as the main ingredient).  He's just so wound up with the all the mares in heat.  He thinks he's a stud!!  Anyway, I'm not too worried about him.  I prefer he be on the skinny side.  At least, he's staying sound.

Leah is also a little skinny, especially compared to last year when she was obese.  You can see her ribs.  But, on the bright side, she too is staying sound.  She stands more solid on all four feet and she moves smoother.

The fact is, none of the horses get more than 2 hours at a time grazing--twice a day. They're all "easy-keepers."

Cowboy is the only one of them that is just about perfect.  You can see a little rib on him, but not too much.  Cowboy gets to graze and then I bring him in at night and give him a combo of alfalfa/grass and a scoop of Senior.


"It takes a lot of money to look this cheap." Dolly Parton

I'm always on the lookout for that "thing" that will help me rock my curls.

But it's hard to find.  Most products either don't work or they make your curls stiff as a board.  Some are unhealthy for your hair and leave too much residue.

But I found AS I AM products & WOW, I'm in love.  It gives your curls great definition, but it doesn't make them hard.

I've ordered everything they make--the Coconut Cleanser, , Double Butter Cream, Leave-in Conditioner & the Smoothing Gel.  So far, I've used the Curling Jelly As I Am Curling Jelly, 8 Ounce and the Double Butter Cream.  Love them both.  The others are on their way, and I'll review them when I've used them.  They are sold at several stores--Target, Walmart, & Amazon.  The Curling Jelly ran around $12.00 for 8 oz at Walmart.  By the way, I'm Type 3a hair.  It goes 1 a, b, c (straight), 2 a, b, c (wavy), 3 a, b, c (curly) and 4 a, b, c (Kinky).  Most people are combinations.  I may be 3a and 3b.

Here's a photo of me with my oldest son, Brook--back when I let my hair go wildly curly.

It was much longer back then and MUCH healthier without all the constant straightening.  Nowadays, I do blow out the bangs so that it doesn't go so tall...and wide.

And, I have to give a big shout out to curly girl, Kara McCullough!!  I don't usually give a damn about beauty pageants, but when I saw this beautiful scientist rocking the curls--all natural--I had to salute her.

Yeah, we don't all have blonde, straight hair like Farrah Fawcett.  Some of us have crazy, wild, curly hair.....

and it has never been so beautiful as this!  Here's to curls!

Viva la curls!  Viva la curls!


And that boy with me in the picture?  Well, he's all grown up now and he and his brother (they live together) came over and made me a Mother's Day dinner last night!!  Brook, (pictured with his sister below--she and her husband are living with us until the house they're buying closes) made his fabulous hot chili fettuccine sauce over thai pappardelle.

All the kids brought me flowers.

And, we had my favorite wine--Farrington Malbec 2013.

Could life get any better than that??


  1. Glad the woman honored her promise about your pony & you got her back. She looks like a sweetheart. Maybe future grandkids can ride/love on her. Your curls are great! You look so beautiful in that photo. People like me pay good money for perms, just to have something similar. I gave up perms years ago when I started tinting my hair, it was one or the other. My family grays early, so color won out. I've never thought of Farrah as having straight hair, I think of her as having big hair. Funny how perspectives differ. So sweet of your kids, you deserve to be spoiled on Mother's Day!!

    1. Well, as it works out, my brother heard about all this on Saturday during our other Mother's Day celebration, and his wife was interested in their kids working with Lily. So, we'll see.

      So, Farrah probably has wavy--feathered hair. Because of her, I started to feather my hair in the 80's. But I think it was definitely on the straight side--at least that's the "straight" I was looking for. Mine couldn't be further from hers than the sun from the moon. ;)

  2. What a beautiful mane of hair you have in that photo! I have extremely straight hair, without much in the way of body, so I look like I have helmet hair even when I don't. I always wished for curly hair with body -- even got perms for a couple years in my 20s. Glad it all worked out with Lily. We made the same kind of deal with Pistol's owner when she gave her to us. We were friends of many years tho so that helped. She knew us, we knew Pistol -- and its been fabulous for both Pistol (who wasn't getting used) and Brett (who needed a horse to ride).

    1. Ha! Helmet hair. I have that, too. In fact, when I get out of the shower, I wear a hat for like an hour to flatten the top on purpose! That photo was 1991, and hair was big back then. I don't want it quite so big anymore. I mean curly is great, but within reason. That's a good deal for Pistol and the owner with you guys taking her! It didn't work out so well in this case.

  3. Glad Lily found her way back to you and she is happy again. Love your curls. Funny people with straight hair want curls and people with curls want straight. Mine is as straight as a board but I'd love some curls. Great kids to spend Mother's Day with you and make it special.

    1. Yes, she was happy--even after getting beat up by Little Joe. She wanted back out right after my husband locked her up. Yes, people do always want what they can't have. I wonder why that is. I guess, in some ways, we go with what works for us, and curly hair didn't work for me because I didn't know how to control it. My step-daughter has a child with curly hair (mom has straight hair) and she read books, talked to others, & just immersed herself in ways to manage curly hair so that she could help Sophie (my horse-crazy, curly haired grand-daughter) I was super impressed by that. There is a lot more information out there today--more products--groups on Facebook--books to read.

  4. I'm glad that your pony came back and that woman was as ethical as you believed (so some of your instincts were right). Happy Mothers day!

  5. I've been trying to sell my gray Arabs, but backed out of a deal to sell Bombay for no specific reason. Just a feeling. So, I know it's hard to let them go. You may think that logically the new owner is fine and everything should work out well, but if your instincts aren't in line with your logic, it's easy to change your mind. I was rooting for Miss USA to win because of her hair! I loved it! I have kinky hair at the base of my head, and then moving upward, it is curly, then wavy, then straight on top. I've been losing fullness now that I'm older and struggle to detangle it. My stylist recommended coconut products. I've been using some coconut shampoo, but it seems to dry out my hair to the point of it breaking when I try to comb it out. I saw you had one coconut product in your picture. I might try that As I Am.

    1. I don't know how it will work for kinky hair, but it wouldn't hurt to try. You may want to Google it and see of a recommendation/review comes up. I'm 3a curly. One review said it's best for 3b and 3c, but I love it, so I'm not sure what that's based on. I assume the reviewer is 3b, 3c and just speaks for herself. Miss USA does have some beautiful hair. She's an ambassador for us!

  6. Good instincts- the horses know too. Hopefully Lily will have a "kid career" in the near future.
    You have lovely curls! My sister Margi has curls like that, the only one of 7 girls in the family who doesn't have boring straight hair. She straightens it but I always think she looks better with curls.

    1. Yes, the horses do know. You're right. Lily was happy to be home, that is for sure.

      Oh, your poor sister. She probably grew up with the ugly duckling complex. I know I did. When you're surrounded by people with beautiful straight hair and a society that pushes it with straight irons, blow dryers, chemical straightening, and no one around you has one clue how to take care of it or style it, you feel very much cursed. I straightened for most of 50 years.

  7. I think your curls are gorgeous! My mother is a hairdresser by trade, she always says curly haired girls want straight hair & straight haired girls want curls (guess which one I am).

    You are VERY lucky indeed on Lily, & I'm glad for you both.
    I foolishly gave a horse to someone (at a lot of expense to myself) who, despite her claims, turned out to be not at all equipped to train him (though she claimed to have trained quite a few horses from scratch & even written books, though nowhere did she mention *until after she had the horse* that even her "star pupil" had double-barreled her in the chest once).
    She then promised to let me know how the horse did in the training facility that she gave him to, but never a word since. Not only that, but she outright implied that I had sent her a bad horse & misrepresented him to her - she all but came out and accused me, which was so insulting, because she had had every access to my trainer who had started the horse.
    It was a singular goddamn disaster & I would never, ever give a horse away again - I'd sooner have a horse put down than to put them through such nonsense.
    Once bitten, twice shy.

    1. Sorry I'm just responding to this. I remember your story with that horse, and I am so sorry it turned out like that. It's a nightmare, I know. And,I agree with you about as soon putting a horse down than go through it again. Changing homes is hard on horses--and I'm not a fan of doing it to them. I can't guess which you are--curly or straight?


Please feel welcome to join our discussion by telling us about your own thoughts and experiences.